“People hearing without listening” is one of the lines in the iconic song The Sound of Silence which I recently ran across on YouTube. The listening challenge, however, is when you’re interacting with someone who is “talking without speaking.” They may be talking but not saying what they really mean. Or their non-verbal actions convey that they have something more…
One of the best things a supervisor can do to build trust is to openly listen to an employee’s feedback—and give an honest reply about what will happen to their suggestion. Then act on it! In my first book If You Can’t Say Something Nice What DO You Say, I share the following sample replies: “Thanks for your input. Although…
In an interview about my new book Say What You Mean in a Nice Way: Working Together Better in High-Tech Times, I was asked “how can we be more diplomatic?” I loved that question because people sometimes mistake the word “nice” for “weak” or “wimpy”, but I believe that the word can mean “tactful,” “assertive”—not aggressive!—and, well, “diplomatic.” Here’s how…
These five phrases appear to be nice, but really are not. They can be passive aggressive and should be avoided—face-to-face and online. These terms are usually used as a get-out-of-jail-free card following a mean comment. If you feel the urge to mitigate a mean comment using one of these phrases, that may be a signal the statement itself could have…
During this crisis, you may be asking the question, what can I do to help? How can I communicate that I care? What difference can I make? Meanwhile, you may be scrambling to save your own business or keep your career from crashing, all while home schooling your children. It has been more than a month since the Covid-19 quarantine…
I surveyed my monthly Communique’ readers earlier this year, asking them this question: “What annoys you most about the way people communicate online?” The responses fell neatly into these three categories: Mistakes and Misspelling, Misunderstanding, Meanness. I’ve summarized the responses below almost word-for-word as received. I’ve also included duplicate responses in order to emphasize how annoying some online communication habits…