“People hearing without listening” is one of the lines in the iconic song The Sound of Silence which I recently ran across on YouTube. The listening challenge, however, is when you’re interacting with someone who is “talking without speaking.” They may be talking but not saying what they really mean. Or their non-verbal actions convey that they have something more…
This was shared with me by a friend and I thought it was the perfect hi-touch-meets-hi-tech take on LOVE. Enjoy! Technical Support: Yes, how can I help you? Customer: Well, after much consideration, I’ve decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process? Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed? Customer: Well, I’m…
One of the best things a supervisor can do to build trust is to openly listen to an employee’s feedback—and give an honest reply about what will happen to their suggestion. Then act on it! In my first book If You Can’t Say Something Nice What DO You Say, I share the following sample replies: “Thanks for your input. Although…
“We already tried that.” “That won’t work.” “That will never happen here.” Nothing will ever work according to these common comments made by the Naysayer. Or how about Sarcasm, the Naysayer’s witty cousin, who says: “Yeah right.” “Dream on.” “Good luck with that.” These roles and similar ones can hinder a group’s process by diverting the attention away from achieving…
In an interview about my new book Say What You Mean in a Nice Way: Working Together Better in High-Tech Times, I was asked “how can we be more diplomatic?” I loved that question because people sometimes mistake the word “nice” for “weak” or “wimpy”, but I believe that the word can mean “tactful,” “assertive”—not aggressive!—and, well, “diplomatic.” Here’s how…
I’ve found that having an attitude of gratitude has been the secret to staying positive and hopeful. In the words of the legendary motivator Zig Ziglar: “Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” I recently surveyed my Facebook…
These five phrases appear to be nice, but really are not. They can be passive aggressive and should be avoided—face-to-face and online. These terms are usually used as a get-out-of-jail-free card following a mean comment. If you feel the urge to mitigate a mean comment using one of these phrases, that may be a signal the statement itself could have…
During this crisis, you may be asking the question, what can I do to help? How can I communicate that I care? What difference can I make? Meanwhile, you may be scrambling to save your own business or keep your career from crashing, all while home schooling your children. It has been more than a month since the Covid-19 quarantine…
I surveyed my monthly Communique’ readers earlier this year, asking them this question: “What annoys you most about the way people communicate online?” The responses fell neatly into these three categories: Mistakes and Misspelling, Misunderstanding, Meanness. I’ve summarized the responses below almost word-for-word as received. I’ve also included duplicate responses in order to emphasize how annoying some online communication habits…
In our personal and professional lives, teamwork comes in many forms. From group assignments and project management at work to social and family planning at home, we often need to work together better. No matter what the context, all teamwork has something in common: the three types of behavior that people exhibit while working in a group. Generally, when working…